It was a beautiful morning this morning. A lovely autumn Adelaide sunday – people riding around, jogging, walking, strolling about and soaking up the sun. I found myself at Henley Beach – Joe’s Kiosk to be exact – and it was packed with brunchers and mid morning latte drinkers like me. So packed in fact was it that a woman asked if she could join my table as there really was nowhere else to sit.
She would have been about 56 or 57 I think. Not a classic beauty, but she had an attractiveness about her. Dancing, sparkling grey eyes; longish blonde/grey hair; lovely full breasts spilling out of her top; and nice full hips squeezed into a pair of well cut jeans. We chit chatted about this and that..poked fun at a few fellow diners…and then started talking about relationships and their vagaries and disappointments. She was an engaging conversationalist and suggested, rather than said, that she had enjoyed an active sex life with her previous partners and had been adventurous on many occassions although single for some time. Having found cracking the “Couples Seeking Bi Male” scene more than a little difficult, I’d recently added to my on-line ad that I’d also be interested in meeting a woman who would be interested in teaming up as a couple to meet other couples with similar interests. This also had been as barren, as far as responses go, as a state Liberal Party policies and I began thinking about floating the idea to this new found friend. But how do you do this? What is the etiquette for saying: I find you attractive/I’m also interested in swinging with couples/would you like to join me? How do you say to someone you’ve just met that, yes, I’d love to feel your nakedness next to mine and by the way are you bisexual and do you mind if I am and I’d like you to play with me and some other people I don’t know yet? Seems like a lot to suggests to someone with whom you’d been discussing organic bacon with 5 minutes earlier and the inconsistencies of cafe coffee temperatures but you only have a limited window of opportunity!
I was concious that she was finishing her coffee and time was of the essence. She asked me whether I was seeing anyone as she leant across the table giving me a clear look at her gorgeous assets knowing full well I was watching behind my sunglasses. I told her no and she smiled suggesting that maybe we could catch up again sometime for another chat. I asked her for her number. “No…but I’m always here around this time on a sunday”. So it is a ‘maybe’, she gulped the last of her coffee and was on her way.
I walked back to the car unsure of myself and wondering why on earth I hadn’t said anything. If I had, would it have been any different? By telling her what I was interested in, would I have got her number of a slap across the face? I probably will never know now.
On-line partners are hard to find when you are in a niche market. Face to face is better but fraught with issues of courage, or the occassional lack of it.
Today I lacked courage and will forever regret it. Why is it so awkward?
Time to logon for more disappointment. Time to toughen up and take calculated risks.